Child loss is child loss whether it’s inutero or in life. Nobody needs to No I need to repeat yourself I ignore you just fine the first time shirt feel shame over the loss, never. I’ve lived thru both miscarriage and the death of my son when he was 30. Miscarriage isn’t a stigma. It happens every day. Parents weep for their lost child throughout the world. Remember that the fathers feel the loss as much as the mothers. People tend to forget this. Not stigma exactly but the whole glossing over, ‘you can try again, why are you still upset, it’s been weeks’ as if it’s just a late period. It’s not. Even if your mind is ok with it your hormones are all over the place, you aren’t right for months. I think the stigma comes from more of an inward place than from society.
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If celebrities share their stories and No I need to repeat yourself I ignore you just fine the first time shirt help just one woman feel not so alone in wondering if she inadvertently caused it, then I say share away. Normalizing something like this can do wonders for vulnerable women who are enduring this tragedy. I have been raising awareness by writing a children’s book around the memory of babies gone too soon. All proceeds are going to baby loss charities this month so people can get the support they need after losing a baby.
I have seen how it affects so many of my friends, there should be no stigma but nothing but love and compassion. I don’t think it’s a stigma, but it is definitely a taboo, particularly early miscarriage. My experience was that I was expected to move on right away, and brush it all under the carpet. The fact that I didn’t get the chance to process it then, means that I still feel the loss and guilt very deeply now, more so (in my opinion) than if I had been allowed to speak about it properly back then and grieve.